I have wanted to update this blog for a LLLOOONNNGGG time now. Countless times I have started to write, and for one reason or another (aka kids), I just never finished a single post. It is damn near impossible to summarize the last 7 months in one post. If you are anything like me, when I see a long blog post your eyes just skim for the important stuff. The one thing I am going to change with this blog is just to be me: a crazy knitter who wants to just tell it like it is. Most of you do not know me personally, and for those of you who have to read my blog to find out what is going on in my life, HA HA HA HA HA.
A quick modified summarization (believe, me if I didn’t modify it would go something like Sex in the City meets Grays Anatomy with a bit of Nip/Tuck thrown in for fun). Of the last 7 months (note: important for you skimmers): I now work full-time, moved out of my home, moved to a city nearby my former hometown, filed for divorce and started to embark on my new life (ok, cheesy I know). It has been a rollercoaster ride filled with tears, pain, heartache, laughter, freedom, guilt, discovery, awe, amazement, worry, and every emotion a person can feel. At times it just seems like the ride will never end, and you just want to get off to live a normal life.
Divorce is one of the toughest things a person can go through. It brings out the worst in yourself and every person affected by it. You see a side of yourself that you didn’t know existed and your former mate turns into Jekyll/Hyde. If you didn’t get along very well while married, getting divorced is 100% worse!!!!! And, no one gets divorced because they just couldn’t handle how well they got along and how great the marriage is. A crucial lesson I have learned is that divorce has 3 sides- his, mine, and the truth. The loudest side seems to win at first, but once the dust begins to settle a bit, the truth works it’s self out. Just like every other life changing event, it is dust in the wind. We all are just dust in the wind.
In the whirlwind of things, I have managed to knit some. (Insert a moment to applaud, fellow knitters) To me there is nothing more therapeutic than having needles in my hands. I try to sneak in knitting every chance I get around the constant changing schedule of the kids. The days of me being able to knit poolside for 8 hours a day are now being used in the office. So it seems that I do most of my knitting traveling. Lucky enough, I get to travel for work, and have had some awesome weekend trips around the state.
The only time I do not get to knit is when riding “Bitch” on the back of the Harley. I know if the project was simple (memorized, that washcloth pattern) enough, the ball of yarn (small and cheap), and the ability to use circular needles (not the Addi’s, just in case), I could knit on the back of the Harley. Really, I know I could!!!!! Mr. Perfect seems to think otherwise. He "claims" it is for safety reasons. Believe me, in case of Emergency, my needles would be the least of our worries. Personally, I think he would rather have my arms wrapped around him than making yet another dishcloth. Safety??? NAH!
My first big project of the year was these “ Guitar Man” socks. Men have such big feet especially when you have 100 stitches per inch. Ok, not maybe not a 100 stitches, but it is at those times you wonder if… would he mind an anklet sock? I will just tell him how sexy it makes him look. Did I say I would knit a pair of socks, or did I say a sock? How did he end up with such monster size feet? Was his dad BigFoot? (Ok, he has a normal size feet. 10 ½?)
A year later I finally used up one skein of the sock yarn that I bought from Sock That Fit. One skein down, only 10-15 skeins more to go! It took me nearly 2 months to finish them, and I determined the only way to knit socks faster was to learn how to knit two socks at once, magic loop style. I was so excited. In my head I envision the kids all opening up their brand new hand-knit socks, each pair designed personally for them with all their favorite colors on Christmas morning. I could just see it now!!! The crew is in awe because I was able to whip them out so fast. They never even saw me knitting them. Squeals of joy ring through my ears as they try them on. And we all do a little sock dance!
In reality, knitting 2 socks at once is more like a ménage-a-trois gone seriously wrong! What a mess that was! First, I had to try to manually even the balls out, then hand weigh the balls just in case one ball was wound to tight. I couldn’t keep track of which string belonged to which ball. Should I start on top or should I start at the bottom? All the switching back and forth, trying to figure out which needle comes first, making sure I don’t leave that other needle out, the is yarn all twisted up in each other. UGH! I am just ready to frog the whole damn thing!
I have come to the conclusion that the problem is that it is a “yarn - not me” type of issue. Or, you know your yarn is just “not that into you” sort of issue. You see, I have tried 4 times before to knit a pair of socks with this particular yarn. Each time trying a different pattern, even making a swatch for each of those patterns (When you take the time to make a swatch, it is an important project - no room for mistakes, and most likely a gift for someone special, you have to be very special to get a pair of hand knit socks, I can make a sweater faster than a pair of socks). And out of those 4 tries, I had a different recipient in mind.
Her true issue is that Miss Pinky just thinks each of those 4 other projects are not worthy of her beautiful, soft, hand-dyed, hand-made yarn. She thinks that she is much too hot to lower herself to be socks, to be on the bottom of someone’s feet. Believe me, I have tried to tell her she is Sock Yarn; I have shown her the label. I keep telling her “Once a sock, always a sock, you would make an awfully thin scarf and an even worse hat.” Just accept your fate and deal with it, you are sock yarn, not cashmere. I hope as she spends time with all her other yarn buddies in the cedar chest, she will want to come out and become something some day.
I know in time, it will happen… I am trying to practice patience with her. Then one day while looking for some inspiration, I will open up the chest and she will be among her buddies crying out, “Pick me, Pick me, I want to BE something!” However, shouldn’t it be 3 strikes your out? I even gave her a 4th chance, and we are back to where we started from. Even worse yet, instead of having one ball, I have Miss Pinky and Miss Pinky2 to contend with. I will just stuff them on the bottom of the chest and try not to think about them. I am sure that with time, they will just become a “What the Hell Was I thinking?” type of relationship.